Faith, Hope, and Love

Faith- noun: (1)firm belief in something for which there is no proof (2)complete trust
I have been around the church all of my life, and have heard the word "faith" for as long as I can remember. I always thought of faith as being something that I had in God (example: I have faith in God that He will take care of me....I know it sounds like a young child, but that's what I was when I thought it). After the past 28 years (and more importantly the past five) I now realize that faith is something I will never completely grasp. Faith for me is TRUSTING. Trusting that no matter how dark it looks, there is always a light that can be seen. Faith is not understanding why things happen, but knowing that our Creator does know, and knows what is best for each of us. Faith is believing, when you have no other reason to believe. Faith (for me) is trusting in the Lord, when you feel you have nothing left to say to Him.

Hope- verb:(1) to desire with expectation of obtainment (2) to expect with confidence
Hope can be used two ways; as a noun and as a verb. I am going to use it interchangeably. In my life I have done a lot of hoping. When I was young, I hoped for material things (a horse, bike, to watch Riverdale High School win the state championship, etc.). In college I hoped for different things: security, love, a job, etc. After college, what I hoped for, once again changed. I hoped and prayed for miracles with loved ones struggling with illness. I hoped for comfort when I thought I would never feel whole again. I hoped for safety for friends and family when I realized that bad things can happen and people can die young (I know this sounds morbid). And up until recently, I look back and realize all the things I hoped for were very selfish. Everything I hoped for benefited me in some way. My hope now focuses on my children. I hope for them to be safe, healthy, and happy. If they are safe, healthy, and happy then I can rest assured that I will be completely happy!

Love- verb:(1)  unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (2) the fatherly concern of God for humankind
I have several pet peeves, and one of them is people who overuse the word "love". This simple four-letter word holds some of the deepest meaning in the human language. It was out of "love" that God gave His only Son so that we could be saved. I will never understand a love like that. I am so thankful that a love like that exists, so that I (and my family) may know eternal life. I didn't know true love until I met Nora. Love has taken on a new meaning for me. Love is completely unselfish. For me, its doing everything I possibly can so that Nora and Cohen will know the love of God, and will see it daily through Brad and I. Its loving them more than myself and being willing to sacrifice everything for the two of them. I feel fortunate to have gotten to witness several acts of love at this point in my life. Some of them among family members, some among friends, and others at work. Love is the word for me that means everything and without it, we are all lost.

I want to say a HUGE thank you to everyone who has spoken Cohen and our family's name to the Lord the past few weeks. I have no doubt that He heard each prayer and comforted our family during this time. I am so thankful to say that yesterday at 7:00 p.m. Cohen was discharged to come home. The joy that we felt was indescribable! He is doing great and we are getting settled in as we speak. I do not know why Cohen got sick, and the doctors still do not know what caused it. I do not know why Nora was born early, and again the doctors to this day cannot explain it. I do know that both experiences with our children in the NICU have made Brad and I stronger. I do know that both experiences have brought us to our knees and have caused us to question God. At the end of both experiences we have come away thankful and more aware than ever of a Creator who loves us. We watched both of our children struggle their first few weeks of life, and we their earthly parents were unable to do a thing to help them. Thankfully, they both have a heavenly Father who loves them even more. 

I write all of this because I know I am like so many people who pray on a daily basis. I pray for friends, family, our world, those who are suffering, situations I can't control, and guidance. The question that I am stuck with right now is, why does it take one of my children being in the NICU to make me have an ongoing conversation with God? He wants this from me all the time; just a steady conversation about life. While I don't know and never will why any of the "bad" things happen to us, I can't help but think once again God was reminding me that His plan is far better than mine, and that I HAVE to trust in Him at all times. In the good times and the times when I can't understand what is going on. I have to have faith that He will see me through it, and whatever trial it is; that trial is preparing me for something later on, that I can't see yet. I believe  He reminded me to hope at all times, knowing that he will give me the desires of my heart (Psalm 37:4).  I believe that He reminds me every day that He loves me in a million different ways. Thank you again from the bottom of our hearts for the prayers, encouraging text messages, phone calls, dinners, etc. I pray that we are able to repay to each of you in the future!

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

- 1 Corinthians 13:13